On the power of saying "Thank you"

I find the holidays, if not managed carefully, can lead me to feeling farther away from people, rather than closer. This is ironic, because my culture sets up often unrealistic expectations for this time of year - 'tis the season to be jolly, etc. To counter this I'm trying to cultivate an attitude of thankfulness, and let it show through my actions.

Here's an example that left me feeling great: While waiting on the phone with Canon support regarding a printer [1] that's malfunctioning, I found my initial attitude was not a Really Useful one [2] - I was expecting long delays, accusations of misusing the printer, etc. Having recognized this I tried to keep it in check when I was connected (quickly!) to a very helpful man who reassured me that they would take care of me. The interesting point came when he put me on hold to get his supervisor's permission to send me a replacement print head - a costly item.

I felt tremendously grateful, and spontaneously offered to write the supervisor a thank you letter for my guy's work. He was extremely grateful, gave me an email address to use instead (even easier!), and told me almost no one he helps does this [3]. He then went back to the supervisor to arrange for me to get a new printer instead of just the part. I hung up very satisfied. Because the email took less than two minutes to write [4], I sent it off immediately after hanging up, giving me a nice sense of closure.


Too often I get bogged down with the details of life, and forget to appreciate the important things - food, clothing, and shelter; the wonderful and loving people I know; the deep respect of someone truly listening; the profound gift of a caring teacher [5]; and the natural beauty around me. So a hearty end-of-year thank you! to my readers, and to the myriad people involved in making this interdependent world function. I am deeply grateful.


References

• [1] The printer is a PIXMA iP3000, which is great for general printing, pictures, and Hipster PDAs. See diyplanner.com for printable GTD-compatible templates.
  
• [2] The concept of a Really Useful Attitude comes from the book How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less by Nicholas Boothman, which I reviewed here.
  
• [3]In his free e-book 100 ways to help you succeed/make money, Tom Peters offers:

  The rarest of gifts: THANK YOU!
  
  Alas, it (a nod of appreciation, a hastily penned, 2-line T-note) is so rare. (And thence ... ever so powerful!)
  
  Hints:
  
  

  1. Make it "permanent" - send a note.
     
  2. HANDWRITTEN notes beat emails!!!!!!!
     
  3. This applies equally at age 18 in a "powerless" job, as well as at age 48 as Honcho.
     
  4. Do this especially when you "don't have time" - at the end of a stressful day.
     
  5. Make it a "formal" habit- do it at the end of the day, say, every 2 or 3 days.
     
  6. If you can't think of anything or anyone to say "Thank you" to - I suggest you go see a shrink.

  
  
• [4] For a summary of GTD, including the 2-minute Rule, see the Wikipedia entry on GTD.
  
• [5]In How Do You Say "Thank You"?, Bert Webb talks about the challenge of rewarding teachers, who are very underpaid, but hold (in my opinion) very important jobs. His suggestions to show appreciation include thank you cards, recognition programs (e.g., Teacher of the week), letters of commendation, and others.
  

Knowing when you're on to something special

While talking about GTD with my illustrator friend Rebecca Guay (check out her books on Amazon), we realized that two of our passions (writing children's books, and productivity coaching) have something deep in common. I love the way she put it: "You know you've hit a nerve when your idea expands into infinite possibilities."

In her case, she's come up with a great idea for a new children's book, and it continues to support deep exploration (e.g., she can easily imagine an entire series). For me, diving into the personal productivity realm just keeps getting more interesting, broader, and richer. In addition to absorbing ideas from great thinkers like David Allen, Stephen Covey, Dale Carnegie, and Peter Drucker, my study is exposing me to areas including time management, creativity, etc. I would list them all, but, not surprisingly, Steve Pavlina's already done so - here's his terrific list from Personal Development for Smart People:

• Time Management
  
• Motivation
  
• Overcoming Procrastination
  
• Goals
  
• Courage
  
• Work/Career
  
• Wealth/Money
  
• Momentum
  
• Problem Solving
  
• Balance
  
• Fulfillment
  
• Consciousness

Whew! In other words, I've found that GTD expands into infinite possibilities. Maybe this helps explain its near-cult status [1] - like any activity with such breadth, one can easily plunge as deeply as desired. This also gives me something to offer when asked to justify a blog on the topic - I'm not just imagining secret codes in some strange-but-popular book. (However, if you read the third line on page 73 backwards, you'll see that Allen is in reality...)

Here's how Po Bronson puts it in What Should I Do With My Life?:

"What am I good at?" is the wrong starting point. [...] A simple test: Is your choice something that will stimulate you for a year or something that you can be passionate about for 10 years?

I'm betting this is a 10 year one.


References and related posts

• [1] For more on the cult aspect, see Meme Exploding: Getting Things Done, GTD: A New Cult for the Info Age, The Cult of Getting Things Done, or Meet the man who can bring order to your universe.
  
• Another fabulous quote from What Should I Do With My Life?:The relevant question in looking at a job is not What will I do? but Who will I become?
  
• In "Interesting, but not useful," or Does it pass the scribble test?, I describe another "is it interesting" test - does it make you scribble furiously when reading it or talking with someone?
  

An end-of-the-year idea grab bag: Smelly videos, photo stickers, dissolving staples, and darkening ink for NAs

Here's a collection of various ideas I've come up with over the last few months that didn't warrant their own posts. However, I wanted to share them before the year's out - just for fun. Other silly/crazy ideas welcome - please comment or email. Cheers!

Contents

• Removable image labels for kids
  
• Dissolving staples
  
• Fading paper, darkening ink
  
• Progressively smelly books/videos
  

Removable image labels for kids

Here's an idea I had a long time ago. I would love to print photo contact sheets on removable labels, for kids. A few application ideas:

• At a kids party: Take digital pics, run through program, print on labels, give out during or at end as take-away gifts.
  
• At preschool: Use pictures instead of words. For example: To show where things go at clean-up time
  

Dissolving staples

The problem: After having adopted David Allen's GTD, I've found I print more often - Read/Review articles, emails for projects, and web pages for my Someday/Maybe list. When I'm done with them I like save those that are blank on the back for reusing (one of the three Rs - Reduce, Reuse, and Recycle). However, the staples are a bit of a pain to remove. So the idea: Why not make staples out of a substance similar to dissolving sutures. The thought would be they'd be strong for a few weeks or so, then dissolve rapidly so that they're gone when it's time to reuse the paper.


Fading paper, darkening ink

This set of ideas all come from the problem of physical objects that need increased or decreased attention over time. For the case of decreased attention, here's an example: At my research lab I initialized a Wall of Fame which is a portion of a wall that showcases our work - publications, software releases, jobs, etc. However, we're running out of space, and it's hard to decide what to get rid of to make room for new items. The solution: Paper that's chemically treated to fade with time. Thus, the oldest will be most faded. This happens naturally with most paper, but I'd like something that's "time released" so as to fade at a predictable rate.

The opposite of this is the problem of something needing more attention over time. In my case, how about those old GTD Next Actions (NAs) that are getting stale? The solution: The inverse of that disappearing ink you played with as a kid: darkening ink. Better yet, I'd like ink that changes color over time, say from black to red. This would make those old NAs really stand out.

(Of course, this is an overly elaborate and exotic solution to something that GTD has already solved via the weekly review. By checking each Next Action list at least once a week, I should be noticing cringe tasks, and dealing with them accordingly.)


Progressively smelly books/videos

The final idea addresses overdue books or videos. (Yes, simply writing the due date down in the calendar GTD-style is the way to go, but sometimes one forgets. Also, this might help our non-GTD friends.) The problem: Items become due without giving any sense of it - due dates are intangible. The solution: Use a scratch-and-sniff approach in which the item gets progressively smellier as the due date approaches. For example:

Friend: Matt, what's that smell? Reminds me of Stinking Bishop!

Me: Oh - that's my copy of The 7 Habits. Damn, I really need to finish it; it's really smelling up the place!

This could also apply to books that I want to make progress on reading but haven't. I.e., as an olfactory trigger.

Variations: A progression of different (more noticeable) smells: blue cheese, compost, then finally rotten eggs. Of course they wouldn't have to be "bad" smells, e.g., lemon.

Networking surprises - Some recent unexpected (but successful) outcomes

In her post Find yourself a good mentor, Pamela Stewart suggests finding a mentor in your field of interest, someone who has a thriving, successful business. She goes on to say:

See if they are willing to spend some time with you so that you can find out what it really takes to grow a successful business. [...] For the most part, people love to talk about themselves, so don't be shy to ask someone you admire for a bit of their time. Hopefully you can return the favor when you become successful and famous!

Since I'm training myself to be a personal productivity coach, I appreciated her advice.

This brought up a surprising networking experience I recently had. I asked Pamela if she'd had any experiences in which the person you introduce yourself to reacts in a competitive way. She responded:

Yes Matthew that has happened to me! I tried to get in touch with a guy once about a project I was interested in co-sponsoring. I know I could have helped him as much as he could me, but he never responded after many attempts. I have learned that a fundamental characteristic of a good mentor is not just subject matter expertise, but a real, genuine desire to nurture and grow others. For the most part, I find people to be very open and generous.

I won't go into detail, but two recent experiences surprised me, and made me realize that there are many directions networking with someone can go. In one case I talked with an established professional organizer in the area, who started the call with the very emotional speech "What makes you think I'd be willing to talk to you?" The outcome? No I didn't (politely) hang up (I did seriously consider it). Instead I stayed with her, asking if there was a way we could talk that wouldn't be threatening. We ended up talking for well over an hour, and discovered mutual friends and compatible ideas.

In the other case I met a woman who's also getting into time management training, and wanted me to teach her GTD. (You could almost hear the tables turning.) I would have done it, but I'm booked up now. However, I just discovered that she's teaching a class on stress and time management at a local college. Competitors? Who knows, but I do want to keep in touch because we might be able to help each other in the future. We're both learning!


What I've taken away from this is that I need to continue staying open to outcomes when networking, and more generally when exploring this new field. I know I'll be making mistakes (I like Curt Rosengren's article The genius of mistakes), but I plan on sticking it out.

This also makes me deeply grateful for the great networking experiences I have had - people have been so generous with their time, sharing their wisdom, and being available to me. I only hope I can give something back in return...

Finally, I want to finish with some great quotes from the comments section of Ramit Sethi's Why is networking a dirty word?, in which he gave away copies of Never Eat Alone for the best and worst networking experiences. My favorites:

• The best part about this opportunity was not the job, but more networking, and mentoring. Every time I fixed a partner's computer, they taught me a lesson: what to major in, where to go to school, where to work, what to learn, how to communicate.
  
• [...]the bigger lesson I took from this is a lot of successful networking comes from just being open and willing to share resources, and hook people up when the opportunity arises.
  
• Especially for a young person, mentorship is an absolute must. Every single interaction [...] has been accompanied by lessons in life. Stuff that no textbook or school will teach you. [...] Well established business men/scientists are keen to help you out [...] and let you know if you are making the same mistakes as they did.
  
• [...] try to focus on the joy of meeting interesting people with interesting stories as being your reward. This reward should be enough for you to be excited about getting contact information and keeping in touch with people. If you happen to profit economically later on, consider it a bonus and nothing more.
  
• Moral? Networking is all the time, not just when you think you should turn it on.

Great stuff!

An idea for 2006: Track completed GTD projects (plus some "greatest hits" for 2005)

For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, or a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life. -- Fr. Alfred D'Souza

In Creating your own "productivity guidelines" for 2005, Sally McGhee et. al. suggest we review accomplishments in the previous year, reflect on lessons learned and successes (hopefully WILD), and apply them to the coming year.

I thought it would be useful to do something similar for 2005 in GTD fashion by looking at completed projects. Sadly I haven't been tracking finished projects (I've simply checked them off and moved on), so one of my projects for 2006 is to record completed projects. I hope that this will help me re-focus on those small "stealth" projects that I find sometimes slip by, in spite of my discipline.

However, in the spirit of openness and experimentation, I present my partial GTD Projects "Greatest Hits" for 2005. In no particular order:

• Adopted GTD "100%"
  
• Got unpleasant dental scaling done (more to come - ugh!)
  
• Started this blog
  
• Got picked up by the OfficeZealot.com Getting Things Done Zone (thanks, Marc!)
  
• Started exploring GTD consulting, and coached 1/2 dozen practice clients.
  
• Committed to designing and delivering a GTD seminar at work
  
• Got our research lab to try "Boss blogs" (see Applying 'Boss' Blogging to a Research Lab)
  
• Lost 15 pounds (and it's running around the neighborhood, so don't be alarmed if you see it. Repeat after me: "Fat has no teeth. Fat has no teeth...")
  
• Attended GTD | The Roadmap seminar
  
• Sold my mountain bike, and started Tae Kwon Do (after a 20 year break)
  
• Cured my insomnia
  
• Made major mental perspective shift in a back problem, and got some serious pain under control
  

I'd love to hear some of your greatest hits for 2005, and goals for 2006.


Related

• In Planning for the Future, LJ has some insights gained by reviewing completed projects. I particularly like this idea:

  I went over my project list and examined the motivation behind each one. I found that many of the projects had been placed there by other people in the form of "shoulds". I decided which ones were important to me and did a massive culling of my someday/maybe list.

  
  
• In Getting Things Done: the Roadmap, terrie passes this along from David Allen:

  It might be useful to keep a list of completed projects, but don't bother with a list of completed next actions. It's not worth it.